The Left’s Version of The Book of Genesis Part 2

2:7 And the LORD Gov formed man’s mind of a progressive.

2:8 And the LORD Gov planted a garden eastward in Eden; and there he put the man whose mind he had formed.

2:9 And out of the ground made the LORD Gov to grow every tree that is pleasant to the sight, and good for food; the tree of life also in the midst of the garden, and the tree of truth.

2:10 And the LORD Gov commanded the man, saying, Of every tree of the garden thou mayest freely eat:

2:11 But of the tree of  truth, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely be ostracized.

2:12 And the LORD Gov said, It is not good that the man be indoctrinated by himself; I will indoctrinate him a help mate. So, Gov found a woman to indoctrinate.

2:13 And they were both indoctrinated and were none the wiser.

2:14 Now the conservative was more subtil than any person. And he said unto the woman, Yea, hath Gov said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden?

2:15 And the woman said unto the conservative, We may eat of the fruit of the trees of the garden:

2:16 But of the fruit of the tree which is in the midst of the garden, Gov hath said, Ye shall not eat of it, neither shall ye touch it, lest ye be ostracized.

2:17 3:4 And the conservative said unto the woman, Ye maybe ostracized:

2:18 For Gov doth know that in the day ye eat thereof, then your eyes shall be opened, and ye shall know the truth of Gov and progressives.

2:19 And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat.

2:20 And the eyes of them both were opened, and they knew that they were being conned; and they knew Gov was fallible and did not need him so much. That Gov would also treat them as children. That there no such thing as collective salvation. And liberty and self-control is healthy.

2:21 And they heard the voice of the LORD Gov walking in the garden in the cool of the day: and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD Gov amongst the trees of the garden.

2:22 And the LORD Gov called unto Adam, and said unto him, Where art thou?

2:23 And he said, I heard thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was duped by thou; and I hid myself.

2:24 And he said, Who told thee that thou was duped by thee? Hast thou eaten of the tree, whereof I commanded thee that thou shouldest not eat?

2:25 And the man said, The woman whom thou indoctrinated with me, she gave me of the tree, and I did eat.

2:26 And the LORD Gov said unto the woman, What is this that thou hast done? And the woman said, The conservative talked to me, and I did eat.

2:27 And the LORD Gov said unto the conservative, Because thou hast done this, thou art cursed above all people, and thou will be ridiculed, insulted, and blamed for all the days of thy life:

2:28 And the conservative said, What else is new.

2:29 And unto Adam he said, Because thou hast hearkened unto the voice of thy wife, and hast eaten of the tree, of which I commanded thee, saying, Thou shalt not eat of it: cursed is the ground for thy sake; in sorrow shalt thou eat of it all the days of thy life;

2:30 And so both Adam and Eve were kicked out the garden because they had their eyes opened and became conservatives or at least not progressives anymore. They had children and their children had children who also became conservatives which really ticked off Gov.